Tag: psalms

For the secret power of lawlessness is already at work;
but the one who now holds it back will continue to do so
till he is taken out of the way.
2 Thessalonians 2:7

But you are a shield around me, O LORD.
Psalm 3:3

Hide me in the shadow of your wings from the wicked who assail me.
Psalm 17:8-9
How priceless is your unfailing love!
Both high and low among men find refuge in the shadow of your wings.
Psalm 36:7

He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.
Psalm 91:4

I have been asked on a number of occasions, “Do you ever wonder ‘why me?’” In conversing about my life’s events, a friend clearly said, “Your life is harsh.” Even those who agree with me that my Sovereign God has a purpose in all of this shake their heads in bewilderment at the depth of the pain, betrayal, loss, and ongoing issues. Not many want to walk in my shoes!

As I meet with weary ones who are trying to make sense of the trials and troubles of life’s journey, I, too, am tempted to proclaim that life is harsh! They don’t “deserve” this … and that I would not want to walk in their shoes!

So often I’m reminded of the number of times my pastor included in his sermons the idea that while this world is a mess, in shambles, filled with pain, God in his mercy holds back the full extent of the evil that Satan would want to send to wreak havoc all the more. His intent is total destruction. God’s love for the creation and people that he has made compels him to hold the worst at bay … and to breathe his good into the ugliness that seeks to consume us.

My life … fraught with pain from betrayal, unfaithfulness in my spouse, the abuse of my children and me, the fallout of sin tearing apart relationships, the weight of a life of responsibility as a single parent … watching my children hurt. My dreams of marriage and a happy and stable home have been shattered. The life of blessing in which I could spend so much time investing in and being with my children has changed to fulltime work and somehow balancing the needs of all of us. The ache of it all and the recurring playback of “this isn’t how it’s supposed to be” echo each day.

But it could be so much worse. The abuse could have been far more intrusive and debilitating … and it could have gone on far longer undetected. I could have had no job and had to hit the streets looking for one. I could have lost my children to a system that might not have believed me. I could have lost my home and my income. The girls might have lost the stability of their school, their friends, and their loving teachers. My health could be at its lowest instead of its best in years. My family could have rejected me. My church could have accused or cast me away. I and my daughters could have been left without godly counselors to show us the way toward healing. I could be desperately alone on this walk. But I’m not. The “should haves” and “could haves” found a different way in the nurture of my heavenly Father’s amazing mercy and grace.

God’s mighty hand has drawn the line and held back the total destruction that could have come my way with sin and evil bearing down with its full force. He has been my strong fortress, my shield, my defender. Under his wings I have found shelter. The wind still whips and lashes at my ankles, but my head and heart are safely in his care.

Friend, the same is true for you. Remember what we actually deserve. Take a look at the storm and yourself, but then turn your eyes into the fierce, loving eyes of God, who stands powerfully holding back the full force of what seeks to devour you. Know that as he controls the universe, his open arms invite you to a place of refuge. Nestle under his wings. He’s got you covered!

Heavenly Father,

Thank you for your mercy and your tender care.
Thank you for holding back the full force of the evil that would seek to destroy me.
Thank you for doing your amazing God thing that can turn ashes in to beauty.
Thank you for letting me hide under your wings.
I love you.

But you are a shield around me, O LORD;
you bestow glory on me
and lift up my head.
Psalm 3:3

When life as I knew it flew apart that July day, I knew I needed to drink deeply from the truth and comfort God gives in the Bible. As my heart and mind swirled and focus was hard to find, I decided that I would just do the Psalms in order … take that order into my chaos and see what God might do with my meager attempts.

Psalm 3:3 jumped off the page and seared into my heart. It was a promise for the present trial and a hope for the future. I began underlining any verses I could find that stated that God is my shield, my protection, my fortress, or my Rock. (Psalm 5:11-12, 7:10, 9:9, 18:2, 28:7, 31:20, 33:20, 61:4, 84:11, 91:4, 115:9, 119:114, 144:2, etc.). I was desperate for him to show me that strength and power and to envelope me. I felt like I was walking on shifting sand, nothing I thought was true about my marriage seemed to be reality. Facts previously unknown to me slapped me in the face and heart with the cruel betrayal and truth. I needed a shield from the enemy’s arrows. I needed a Rock to hold me steady and firm.

The Psalmist trusted God to be a shield around him. Could I trust him too? Could I rest under the security of his wings (Psalm 91)? An image was described by one praying friend who envisioned my protective angel as having wings that were “hard as steel on the outside but with gentle down feathers underneath.” Did I have the courage to rest in the softness and trust the steel?

And what about the glory? How was I to think about that? I had never known such overpowering shame before. I wanted to hide … in fact those first days I could barely manage a trip to the grocery store without racing home to the protection of my walls. I felt so vulnerable, like an ominous cloud hung around that spoke to any onlooker of my life’s agony. How could God love through that to bestow glory, his glory, on me? What kind of amazing God of love is that? What worth did he see in the person whose life seemed scattered to the wind?

And before I even realized how downcast my heart and countenance were, God promised to lift my head. He gave me hope that what I was feeling in those hours and days wasn’t the end of the story. He would take my face in his two God-sized hands and lift my head to look from the grime on my feet to the glory in his face. At first I could only snatch a glance before needing to hide. But over time, in his gentle persistence and through the love of so many around me, I’ve been able to walk a little taller and spend more time gazing intently on the one who loves me so radically.

Jesus, my shield, my glory bestower, the lifter of my head.

Oh God, give me courage to trust you when the world seems so untrustworthy.
When I have no glory of my own, let me look on your and reflect that to the world.
When I lose my focus on you and instead see only the grime
on my feet and heart, lift my head.
I love you, Jesus.